I'd answer:" I want a small house, a car and a pet dog"
That was it! (and I was definitely proud that I had a dream in life then, haha)
Looking back, it made me think back how simple my thoughts were and that my dream was of a house, a car and a pet definitely showcase of how kids (like me) just want a bahay-bahayan type of life! (lol)
and now, if you ask me, 15 years after, "What I want in my life?"
I'd answer you.. "a LOT"
Material things? Yes. definitely a Lot.
Travel? definitely a yes too!
a dream? YES.
7 years ago after graduating from high school, I still didn't know what I want to be in my life. I was the girl who got good grades and did every sort of extracurricular activities just for the sake of knowing it could help me to get into a good college. I was good at everything but a master of none. Passing most of my college entrance exams, I got options but had no firm decisions. I still didn't know what course to take, what to do after high school, and besides, I've always thought it'll be my parents who would be deciding my future ( read: typical chinese family) and in the end, They did.
I ended up taking Business course in a good college but it felt like it was wrong for me. It took me 2 years to made me realize that I want something else. To think I was almost graduating ( my course was only 3 years and 1 term)! It was definitely a HUGE decision for me to make especially all the time I've wasted, the money my parents had paid for my tuition and of course, all the effort I've put in. It was a BIG move(which I've never regretted!).
My decision to shift course was when one of my most favorite, most loved person, passed away that made me realize what I really wanted in my life. My lolo was my partner in crime, my "lawyer" to my parents and growing up with him and celebrating the same birthday with him- He was a huge part of my life. When he passed away, I was with him during his last few days at the hospital, I remember all the details, the time, the moment when I've seen him in the ICU hooked in all of those equipment . In that instant, I felt so helpless and as much I wanted to help my lolo, I couldn't do anything. He passed away too early, I've wanted more time with him and yet, I can't do anything about it. That moment made me realize how I needed to do something else. I made the biggest change in my life.
From Business, I change my course to Medicine.
It was the opposite of fields and yet I knew it was the right one for me. Shifting mean I had to start from scratch! All my business class were useless in this new field and I had to take more new classes. "Nakakapanibago ang lahat"-from the people, the classes and even the course itself. But I knew I am doing this for me and my Lolo. It was his dream to one day build a public hospital being the philanthropist that he was and one of his dream that someday one of his APO's can be a doctor and manage that hospital. I am living part of his dream and part of mine.
Medicine is a hard, hard,hard,hard field to be in. I've lost many sleep, gave up on many things, spent X amount of money for my schooling and the effort just to passed had to be tripled. Until now, on my 2nd year in med proper, I'm still adjusting, I'm still testing the waters as you could say. You can really never sit still and be well adjusted in a field that is constantly fast paced and on-the go! You just learn how to go with the flow and be constantly moving with it.
So, yes this is my dream, that one day I can be a good doctor.
A good doctor that could serve, heal and advocate a worthy cause.
In my dreams of becoming a Doctor, I looked up to one of the LEGENDS of the medical field-Sanjay Gupta. A neurosurgeon and a resident medical respondent for CNN, I practically grew up watching him on TV. He was like my mentor-slash-idol on TV. It wasn't because he was a TV personality that made me idolized him, nor his achievements, it was his way of delivering his message that made me want to be like him someday. Because he made things simple and easy to understand, he tells it as it is and in a language that everyone can understand. I want to emulate his works, his advocacy but maybe in a different way since I know I can never be a TV personality (too shy for that!)
My first stethoscope where my dreams are beginning to unfold!
This is my dream, that someday I can be a doctor and be a legend who made her marks in this world. I still wouldn't know what kind of marks I'd leave in this world, but I know I am going to work hard for everything in order to see it come in futile. and just like the little train that never stopped from moving:" I think I can, I think I can, I think I can" I'd be the same one like it. I'd never quit on my dreams and my Lolo's dream.
This is my story, my own legend in the making and just like Cheyser marking her own mark in this world inspired me to write this. Definitely inspiring to see other women who knows what they want in life and chasing it!
and like the inscription in my steth:" Jamie Tan, MD. Love. Peace. Happiness. Badminton. Travel"
Things I love all in one piece.
(this is my official entry for Cheyser's Ray-Ban giveaway! :))